• Cheyenne Pajardo

Understanding an Empath.

Part of growing is digging deeply into yourself & understanding why you think, feel, and react how you do. I do not have all the answers or all of the wisdom when it pertains to empathy. I'm not going to pretend I do. But, what I will say is that I'll explain to you as best I can from my point of view.


It's intense. That sounds more dramatic than it is, but I mean it is me that you're talking to...I tend to sound this way nearly always. I'll start by telling you what being an empath is because maybe you are one, but don't know. An empath, as defined by Google, is: a person with the paranormal ability to apprehend the mental or emotional state of another individual. In less complex wording, an empath is someone who is very much in touch with their feelings. They are usually highly sensitive toward others' moods and feelings, too & tend to take on those feelings as their own. I like to think of it as someone who feels all of the feelings of the world at once.


When you are someone who is extremely empathic, it's hard to understand why others are not this way. I'm sure that's how people who aren't empathic feel towards those who are. Isn't that life, though? Trying to coexist & understand others to make the place a happier place?


Well, if you ever decide to love, date, or simply understand an empath, here's my advice to you.

1. We cannot change our hearts.

(We feel a lot, I told you! Even though we are strong, we are sensitive & we do not want you to attempt to "fix" that about us. We aren't broken. We have big hearts & want others to feel loved, too.)


2. We need time alone.

(It's not personal. Generally, we enjoy conversing with people and learning from them. But, this is exhausting. We need time to ourselves in order to recharge and recenter.)


3. We're free spirits.

(I did a post about about this one . We do not react well when it feels that you're trying to cage us. Do not clip our wings because you're scared we won't come back. Have you not been listening? When we love you ,we want to give you all of that.)


4. Be honest.

(There's this weird thought that because we're "always happy, in a good mood, feeling things" that we want everything to be "picture perfect." It's a thought that further expands to believing that if you tell us something that isn't necessarily "happy" or "good," that we'll freak. We might, sure, but that's more human than anything else. The point I'm trying to make is, don't sugar coat. Just be upfront. You're hurting us more by being dishonest.)


5. Our hearts bruise easily.

(We feel a lot, remember? Honestly, being an empath can be exhausting. Like I said, we tend to feel the weight of the world & all the feelings constantly. Because of this, we tend to lean away from the daily devastation that is the world we live in. It can be looked at as avoiding, sure, but some days, protecting our heart & mental stability are far more important. We can cry randomly sometimes, & it may be confusing. But there's reason...even if you cannot understand it.)


6. We vibe off energy.

( I'm laughing typing this one because I was about to say that we feel a lot...but that's been the whole message from this post to being with. When I say we vibe off energy, it means that we can feel the room as soon as we enter. If the room feelings calm and at ease, we adapt. If we enter and the room feels hectic and sad, we adapt to that. Energy is so important. So, if you take us somewhere & we shut down because there are too many people or too many things going on, you know why.)


7. We understand where people are coming from...even if we don't agree.

(It's almost like playing "Devil's Advocate." We have our own beliefs, sure. That's called being human. But, we try to understand the other person's point of view in any situation. We tend to become the "middle man." It's simply because we don't like when people disagree and argue. We want both people to see the situation from the other's perspective.)


8. We want to make everything "better."

(It's not a secret that we hate when people are upset or when things aren't going well. It's an innate feeling to want & help every and any situation.)


9. Intimate relationships can be a lot at times.

(I think this one becomes self-explanatory. For all of the reasons above, being with someone in a serious manner can be a lot. This is why it's so important to understand how an empath reacts and moves about life. If you aren't ready for someone like us, do us both a favor & leave us be.)


10. We know what we want.

(I think we understand ourselves a lot better than most people understand themselves. In part, it's because we're extremely in touch with our feelings & our thoughts. We're quick to tell you if something doesn't sit well with us and if we don't like it. It can be jarring for some, but again. It's important to understand how an empath reacts and moves about life.)


Like I said when I wrote 'Dating a Free Spirit', we can be a lot if you don't understand who we are at our core. We don't want to change you. Do us a favor & don't want to change us.


The world needs more empaths, if you ask me. Imagine if we all understand other's feelings & thoughts without passing judgement.


May your day be ever filled with love, light, and of course, an abundance of chicken tenders💜🌻✨

Cheyenne Pajardo

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