My Calling.
When you fall in love, whether it's with a person or a something, fall in love so completely that it sets your soul on fire. That when you talk about it, others see the passion in your eyes & it leaves them wondering how they can obtain that feeling, too.
I'm open in saying that I'm emotional. I'm SO emotional. But, I'm okay with that. It took me a long time to understand that having feelings & discussing those feelings is normal. That's funny, isn't it? That we somehow have to normalize something that should already be normal to begin with?
We live in a world that is judgmental beyond belief. It's a world that attempts to dictate what we should speak of, how we should speak of it, & when we should speak. It's no wonder that talking about feelings is something most try to put on a back burner. We're scared, to a degree, that we'll be judged for how we feel. & who wants to be judged?
I spent a lot of my adolescent years feeling caged & muted...like talking about my thoughts & those feelings would somehow make me less of a person. I'm laughing as I type this because I feel so silly for thinking that those things were invalid. YOUR FEELINGS ARE ALWAYS VALID.
I say most of this simply because I feel a lot. But I feel to extremes. There aren't really in betweens with me. Does that make sense? I generally love. & when I love, I love hard. I love very hard. Bear with me because I'm getting to the heart of this post.
Since graduating, I've heard the question "What do you want to do with your life?" more often than I can count. It's like you're expected to have it figured it out because you're entering "the real world." SPOILER ALERT: most "adults" don't have it figured out yet. I have always been the kind of person to have a general idea of what I wanted to do with life...I'm an organizer, a planner & planning my future is something that excites me! So, when I moved to LA with the vision of wanting to be a commercial actor, but then realized I didn't, I was shook. Like shookth. Seriously. Changing my mind about a career path wasn't part of my plan. But, acting didn't set my soul on fire, & I needed to experience it in order to know that.
Now, dance...dance has always been something I loved. Well, performing has always been the part that I loved. Let's keep it a stack & say that the dance scene is waaaay more advanced in this city than back in the DMV. As much as it speaks to me & as much as I love it, I've never felt it was my career.
So what was left?
(this is the part where falling in love makes an appearance.)
Words.
yes.
Words.
i love words.
i fall in love with words every time my pen meets paper, my fingers press keys, my mouth goes to speak.
My calling, what sets my soul on fire every single day, is my gift of writing. I could talk about a book, an article, a speech I've heard for hours on end, never getting bored of it. This is what I was born...destined...to do & to share with the world.
What sets your soul on fire? What are you in love with?
May your day be ever filled with love, light, and of course, an abundance of chicken tenders💜🌻✨
Cheyenne Pajardo