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Jordan Year

Dear Me,

As a kid, you used to wonder why adults would always say, "I remember my 20's. What great years!" "If I could go back in time, I'd pause in my 20's." "You experience a lot during your early 20's." You're completing your third year in your 20's, and you believe you're starting to understand why.

Year 23 was the Year of Success. I hope when you look back on it (if you can remember the year because your memory tends to blur everything together) that you remember all the things you did that set your soul on fire. that you remember the heartache, the sorrows, the minor episodes of depression. I hope you remember those pieces especially because they are the ones that propelled you into the moments of success and accomplishments. I hope you remember your growth as a woman and as a partner. that you remember the random nuggets of information that make you laugh when no one is around.

No one really tells you what it feels like to grow. They tell you to take each moment slowly and to enjoy it because it goes by quickly. But, they never tell you what it feels like. Perhaps it's because no one acknowledges it while it's happening, and by the time they do, it's way later. I'm proud of you because you make a conscious effort to stand in your growth and feel it as it happens...not always, but enough.

It's uncomfortable.

Let's continue to be honest and call it what it is. Growth is often uncomfortable because it challenges all the things you know to be true in it's current state. For you, it leaves you either exhausted or in tears because it's not something you generally want to do. But, hey. that's life. You have to do things you don't want to do.

Being 23 meant learning to stand in your calling. It meant taking an idea and watering it until it bloomed into gardens. It meant watching your idea flourish. Being 23 meant finally, finally, after years of not getting the lesson, understanding that if someone wants to be with you, they will be without making excuses. It meant getting your heart broken for the trillionth time and somehow putting together the pieces again. Being 23 meant opening yourself up to the idea that someone exists to love you for your entirety. It meant allowing yourself to swim in the ocean of love that they've created. Being 23 meant learning new ways to love yourself because you are not just a single flower in a garden, but you are the entire garden.

I pray that you remember how you felt being 23. that you soaked in every last drop of being in your 3rd year of this stage of life. that you never, ever let go of the soul you possess because it is that soul that leads and guides you through this world in the way that it does. You are far greater than you give yourself credit for and you are more beautiful than you may ever truly grasp. I pray that you remember being 23 is not the peak of your life. that you know it only gets better from here.

You are all the things that make this life beautiful, and you deserve to live and breathe and laugh and love. May you never forget this magical year, and may you accept the excitement of entering another.

May your day be ever filled with love, light, and of course, an abundance of chicken tenders💜🌻✨

Cheyenne Pajardo

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